everything made Centrifugal pt. 4

...continued from Parts 1, 2, and 3...

Ask the staff I'm working with this summer, and they'll tell you that I'm scared I'll screw everything up. Really, though, how silly is that? One tiny person screwing up a camp that changed lives. It's laughable. But, I've been afraid that I'll mess up doing my job.

I keep mentioning that, my job. Perhaps I'll shed some light on it. ...tomorrow... just kidding!

Where was I in the story?

Ah, yes.


I read through the staff manual when I got it, and focused on my position: Missions Mobilizer. The more I read, the more amazed and awestruck I became at God. I felt like he tailored this position just for me. I couldn't believe the folks at Lifeway thought enough of the work I've done as qualified for such a thing. I've never worked a Fuge camp before-- much less attended one.

I found out that the missions focuses are Canada (specifically Current Canada) and Sub-Saharan Africa. I thought, "I've been to Canada through Current Canada!! I work for some South Africans!! Cool!" I read that my position entailed a lot of teaching and enabling and some taking kids out into the community for service projects (yay!!). My head was swimming with all kinds of thoughts. I thought that if I allowed God to really work through me this summer, people would love the mess out of Canada and Africa. I also thought that if I worked alone, people would think I was crazy for trying to get them to give to Canada and Africa.

I kept wondering how in the world I was going to do this. Was I going to have to figure this out on my own? Then, a little voice in the back of my mind reminded me that Megan told me I'd have special training before camp and that I'd be training with the other Missions Mobilizers from other camps. Phew! Another voice came back and said, "Yeah, but what if you still mess it up?"

Ugh. Hindsight tells me that the enemy's little minions were raging a battle in my mind and heart. They were trying to defeat me (I was trying to defeat me) before I even started. What I saw at the time was my incompetence and fear of being a first time staffer. Meh.

Well, as a staff, we started to get to know each other through our Facebook group, and my director sent us all a message that he wanted to call us to get to know us a little. I thought that was amazing. I don't recall ever working with or for someone who wanted to call those he or she was leading to get to know them before they came to work (with or for him/ her).

Which day did I pick for him to call me? The day we were setting up for my sister's baby shower. Brilliant, I am. He ended calling at the perfect time, though. I needed a break.